Nuggets of Humour

English Open Ended Comprehension:

Q) How did the burglars get into the attic?

A) They carried a ladder into the attic.

When in doubt, create your own question to answer.

Nuggets of Humour

"I love you honey... I love you honey... I LOVE YOU HON-"

*Slap

Nuggets of Humour

Visual Vocabulary on idioms.

I told her "Nigel" wasn't drawn accurately enough...

Nuggets of Humour

You know how you mix up words occasionally?

Today I asked, "Ribena! You don't drink Della do you?"

Nuggets of Humour

So a boy was happily singing the song "Ten Little Indian Boys", and an Indian classmate started strangling him thinking he was being made fun of.

I tried to diffuse the situation by saying that the song was about Red Indians.

She tried to help by saying, "Don't be angry! The song's about Red Indians but you're black!"

Nuggets of Humour

" Mr Yang, why aren't you stupid yet?"
"What do you mean?"
"It's afternoon and you're supposed to be stupid. But you're not."

My student's subtle way of complimenting my intelligence...

Nuggets of Humour

"As you can see here, these are conical flasks and test tubes. I've got 6 sets here on my table. So class, I think you know what your reputation is. As long as glass is involved, you're going to break it. I do not want to hear -"

*Glass shatters.

"Fine. So now your form teacher has the same reputation as you do."

Nuggets of Humour

"Hi Kiara! I'm Elise! Do you remember me?"

"Hi Kiara! I'm Soo Ah! Remember me?"

"Hi Kiara! I'm Mehak! You don't know me!"

Nuggets of Humour

I once told the class I work better in the night and the morning to which they said I was nocturnal. I responded and said as the day wore on, I got stupider, and I was at my dumbest in the afternoon.

Today, a student asked in response to a mistake I made, " Mr Yang, it's only in the morning and you're already stupid?"

Nuggets of Humour

"His name is actually very cool. It's the name of a deity."
"Wow. And yours?"
"Mine means Mother Earth."
"Nice! And yours? What does your name mean?"
"Nice smell."

Nuggets of humour

Hope you guys enjoyed the fool I made out of myself today as Mrs Brisbane...

More to come...

Silence!

Nuggets of Humour

"This hamper is for all of you old folks."

So innocently rude... Whoever you are.

Nuggets of Humour

This is for the parents...

During a Science Lesson... Activity 5.3 to be exact.

"The pebbles in the A cup are the smallest. The ones in B are medium sized. And the C cup pebbles are the largest."

If you don't get it, pride yourself on your innocence.

Nuggets of Humour

"Next time when you get married, don't marry twin sisters. Later get mixed up. Then must wear name tag..."

Nuggets of Humour

Punishment for attempted Sumo wrestling in class:

T: "Go do to the wall what you were doing to each other. You can only leave when the wall comes down."

* After an adequate amount of time...

T: " Do you know why you are doing this?"
S: "Yes..."
T: "Do you feel silly?"
S: "Yes."
T: " So don't do such silly things in class again ok?"
S: "Ok."
T: "Go back to your places."
S: "Mr Yang, do you know that if we had pushed hard enough I think the wall would come down? It felt loose..."
T: "..."

Talk about missing the point...

Nuggets of Humour

T: "Make a sentence with these material nouns."

S: "I found gold while mining underground."

T: "Great! How about the next material?"

S: " I found silver while mining underground."

T: "Yes that works too. How about the next one? Wood?"

S: "I found wood while mining underground."

T: "..."

Birth of a new meme.

Nuggets of humour

T: "Ok so there was once when my sister got followed by a group of men-"
S: "Then she got kidnapped!"
T: "No she didn't get kidnapped... She was just followed.
K... So my sister got kidnapped- I mean followed..."
-.-

Nuggets of Humour

Since I officially started teaching about 3 years ago, I have never experienced such moments of sheer and utter mirth as I have with the students who are now part of my daily existence. Really... Kids say the darndest things. And they have said quite a bit.

Many a time, I have been struck with a belly-aching bout of laughter after a wisecrack, or what is known as a "zinger" - a witty comeback; a quip that transcends, almost defies the innocence of tender years and naivete we have all come to expect from children. All from the kids and their interactions with each other, and many times, including myself.

I would like to use this blog as a platform to share these "Nuggets of Humour" from time to time, which I believe form the very foundations of my pedagogy - learning through play, learning through laughter.

Rest assured the architects of these "nuggets" will always remain unnamed. Some parents may instantly recognize their child's quip, or I might have even shared it with you already. Please do not be offended. No one knows who it is anyway - except yourself! :D

Laugh away...

J

 

Yes... This is how seriously I take myself...